WEDDING and hanging go by destiny

Meaning & Analysis

The proverb asserts that two pivotal and seemingly unrelated life events, getting married and being executed, are not determined by human choice but are preordained by fate.

Insights

Uncontrollable Life Events

The proverb metaphorically suggests that the most significant events in life, both positive and negative, are fundamentally beyond our control. It uses the extremes of celebration (wedding) and punishment (hanging) to represent the spectrum of life's uncontrollable fortunes.

Destiny as an Equalizer

By placing marriage and execution on the same level, the proverb implies that destiny is an indiscriminate force, treating the best and worst of human experiences as equally inevitable. It acts as a great equalizer, subjecting everyone to its whims.

Warning Against Hubris

The saying serves as a cautionary warning against overconfidence or the belief in one's own agency. It implies that no matter how carefully one plans, the ultimate outcomes of life's biggest ventures are left to chance or fate.

Historical Fatalism

The proverb reflects a fatalistic worldview common in eras where individual agency was limited. Marriages were often arranged, and justice could be swift and absolute, making both events feel as though they were governed by an external, uncontrollable force rather than personal choice.

Cynical View of Marriage

By equating a joyous life event with a grim execution, the proverb serves as a cynical social commentary on the institution of marriage, humorously portraying it as a kind of inescapable trap or loss of freedom, akin to a death sentence.

Psychological Resignation

The pairing of wedding and hanging speaks to a psychological need to rationalize life's most significant and unpredictable outcomes. Attributing them to 'destiny' provides a coping mechanism for anxiety and a way to accept circumstances, whether good or bad, as being part of a larger, predetermined plan.

Literary Resonance

Shakespeare's use of the proverb in 'The Merchant of Venice' underscores its popular currency and its thematic relevance to plots involving chance and predetermined outcomes, cementing its place in the English literary imagination as a succinct expression of life's capriciousness.

Rhetorical Devices

Juxtaposition

The shocking and humorous pairing of 'wedding' (a celebrated union) and 'hanging' (a grim execution) creates a powerful and memorable contrast that underscores the proverb's cynical tone.

Irony

There is a dark, situational irony in equating a supposedly joyous occasion with a fatal punishment, which gives the proverb its distinctive witty and pessimistic flavor.

Parallelism

The balanced structure 'A and B go by C' creates a simple, rhythmic, and easily memorable phrase, enhancing its popular appeal and transmission.

fatemarriagedeathcynicismironyfatalism
Analyzed with gemini-2.5-pro on August 10, 2025

Transcription

Quotations

It is my destenye to be hanged.

1519, HORMAN, Vulgaria, p. 37

Wedding is desteny, And hangyng lykewise, sayth that prouerbe.

1546, HEY., I iii, s. A4v

Truely some men there be That . . say it gooeth by destenye; To hang or wed.

c.1550, GOSNYHYLL, Schoolhouse Wom., l. 301, p. 116

Weddyng and hangyng, are desteny I see. Weddyng or hangyng, which is best, sir (quoth shee?) Forsooth good wife, hangyng I thinke best (quoth hee) So helpe me god, good husband, so thinketh mee.

1562, HEY., Epig., 6, p. 129

Wedding and hanging the Destinies dispatch.

1611, DAV., Prov., no. 241

(are both destiny).

1616, WITHALS, p. 561

(Marriage and).

1639, CL., p. 230

Wedding, hanging, and thriuing are euermore gouerned by destiny.

c.1640, W.S., Countrym. Commonw., p. 12
1659, HOW., Eng. Prov., p. 5

[As in 1639 CL.]

1670, RAY, p. 48

Shakespeare Citations

The ancient saying is no heresy, Hanging and wiving goes by destiny.

MV, II.ix

Cross References

Original Scan

WEDDING and hanging go by destiny - a scanned entry from Tilley's 1950 Dictionary of Proverbs.
Scan courtesy of HathiTrust Digital Library.
Used under CC BY-NC 3.0.

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Last updated: January 27, 2026