Meaning & Analysis
The proverb outlines a three-step process for a man to acquire a wife: first, he must court ('woo') her; second, he must legally marry ('wed') her; and finally, he must consummate the marriage ('bed') or possess her as a prize ('wear').
Insights
Formula for Conquest
The proverb functions as a formula for patriarchal conquest, reducing a woman to an object to be won and possessed. The sequence implies a transactional process where courtship is a means to a final goal of ownership and sexual consummation.
Objectification and Possession
It metaphorically represents the reduction of a complex human relationship to a series of goal-oriented actions. The woman is depicted as a passive prize, erasing her subjectivity and agency in the courtship and marriage process.
Male Agency and Female Passivity
The phrase underscores a social structure where male action is the driving force in relationships. The verbs are all active and performed by an implicit male subject, while the woman ('her') is the passive recipient, reflecting a deeply ingrained gender hierarchy.
Marriage as Social Display
The inclusion of 'wear' in the proverb is historically significant, framing a wife as a status symbol or an ornamental possession, much like fine clothing or a jewel. This reflects the patriarchal values of the Elizabethan and Jacobean eras, where a man's social standing was enhanced by the wife he 'wore', linking marriage directly to the acquisition and display of property.
Literary and Dramatic Trope
Prominently featured in works by Shakespeare, Jonson, and other Renaissance playwrights, this proverb encapsulates a transactional and cynical view of courtship common in the literature of the period. It often serves as a shorthand for a pragmatic, rather than romantic, approach to marriage, emphasizing conquest and consummation as the primary goals.
Psychology of Conquest
The proverb reveals a psychological framework of male entitlement and objectification. The progression from 'woo' to 'bed' is presented as a natural, almost inevitable sequence, minimizing the woman's agency and reducing the complex process of relationship-building to a formula for sexual and social conquest.
Rhetorical Devices
Alliteration
The repetition of the 'w' sound in 'woo, wed, and wear' creates a memorable, rhythmic, and forceful cadence that reinforces the sense of an inevitable and smooth progression of actions.
Tricolon / Asyndeton
The proverb is structured as a tricolon (a series of three parallel items). This, combined with the lack of conjunctions (asyndeton), creates a swift, commanding, and prescriptive tone.
Metaphor
The use of the verb 'wear' is a powerful metaphor that equates a woman with a piece of property or an article of clothing that can be won and displayed to signify status.
Transcription
Quotations
And if then shee looke as fayre as before, wooe hir, win hir, and weare hir.
Woe her, wed her, bedde her, an vse her as you list.
Woo them and win them, win them and wear them too.
So may I see the Maid, woo, wed, I and bed her to.
Wed her, and bed her, and when that is done, Then say to Iaques, shall I be your sonne?
They must not stay so long, For whiles they are a learning Languages, My English Youths, both wed, and bed them too.
I may Both wed, bed, and boord her.
If you have woo'd and won, then, brother, wear him.
She is a saint indeed; Zounds to her, court her, win her, weare her, wed her, and bed her too.
Ile not compell her heart, wooe, win, and wed her.
He wedded her, and bedded her, although his Master's Daughter.
Shakespeare Citations
Shall we resolve to woo these girls of France? —And win them too!
That would thoroughly woo her, wed her, and bed her.
I have wedded her, not bedded her; and sworn to make the “not” eternal.
Cross References
Related Proverbs
Original Scan

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