Meaning & Analysis
After a person dies, their wife will quickly forget them, their children will be ungrateful, and the executors of their will are greedy and will take all the assets they can for themselves.
Insights
The Fragility of Legacy
The proverb serves as a stark warning about the unreliability of others in safeguarding one's legacy. It argues that true legacy is not what is left behind for others to manage, but the good deeds one performs while alive, as family and fiduciaries are ultimately driven by self-interest.
Critique of Human Self-Interest
As a piece of social commentary, the proverb critiques the perceived moral decay and self-interest that governs human relationships, particularly when material wealth is involved. It suggests that bonds of love and kinship are easily dissolved by greed after death.
Urgency of Personal Action
The proverb is a powerful call to action, urging proactive charity and personal responsibility. It advises individuals not to delay acts of generosity or the management of their own affairs, as posthumous intentions are likely to be ignored or corrupted by the living.
Memento Mori and Carpe Diem
This proverb is a powerful example of the 'memento mori' tradition, urging individuals to perform good deeds and charitable acts during their lifetime rather than trusting their legacy to others. The 1598 quotation by Stow, 'I wish men to make their owne hands their Executors and their eyes their Ouerseers', perfectly encapsulates this, reflecting a deep-seated cultural anxiety about posthumous reputation and the disposition of one's estate.
Historical Legal Anxiety
The proverb reflects historical anxieties surrounding inheritance laws and the role of executors. In a time before strong legal protections for estates, the executor held immense power, and the fear of their 'covetous' nature was a legitimate social concern. It highlights a popular distrust of intermediaries in handling a person's final wishes.
Psychology of Legacy
The proverb taps into a profound psychological fear of being forgotten and betrayed by those closest to you after death. It articulates a cynical view of familial loyalty, suggesting that grief is fleeting and self-interest quickly replaces love and duty, thus questioning the very foundation of legacy through family.
Gender and Family Dynamics
The text reveals early modern gender and generational biases. The 'forgetful' woman likely alludes to a widow who might remarry, and 'unkind' children to heirs who squander their inheritance or fail to honor their parents' memory. This reflects a patriarchal concern with the preservation of wealth and name beyond the grave.
Rhetorical Devices
Parallelism / Tricolon
The proverb uses a tripartite structure (tricolon), listing three distinct groups—women, children, and executors—to build a rhythmic and memorable argument. This parallelism reinforces the idea that betrayal is inevitable from all quarters.
Aphoristic Statement
The proverb employs a blunt, cynical tone to present its claims as undeniable truths. This aphoristic quality makes it impactful and easily quotable, enhancing its persuasive power as a piece of folk wisdom.
Conclusive Rhyme
The final clause, 'and take what they find', uses simple, direct language to create a powerful image of plundering. The rhyme between 'unkind' and 'find' in the full proverb adds to its memorability and gives it a sense of conclusive finality.
Transcription
Quotations
Do sum good, man, by thy lyffe, Whilis thow hast thy mynde; Thy children will for-gete the sone, Thy wyffe will be vnkynd, Thy executowrs be covytes, And take all that they fynde; Yff thow wilt not, while thow may, They will bryng the behynde.
I wish men to make their owne hands their Executors and their eyes their Ouerseers, not forgetting the olde Prouerbe: Women be forgetfull, children be vnkind, Executors be couetous, and take what they find.
Women be forgetful, children be vnkynde, Executors be couetous, and take what they can finde.
Related Proverbs
Original Scan
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