He that wipes the CHILD's nose kisses the mother's cheek

Insights

Ulterior Motives

The proverb is a metaphor for strategic ingratiation. The act of helping the child is not purely altruistic but a calculated method to win the favor of a more powerful or desired individual—the mother. The 'kiss' symbolizes any form of reward, approval, or advancement.

Indirect Approach

It illustrates the principle of achieving a goal indirectly. Rather than approaching the target of one's ambitions head-on, one can more effectively gain their favor by appealing to their emotional attachments and priorities.

Flattery Through Action

The act of wiping a child's nose symbolizes a form of practical flattery. It demonstrates desirable qualities like kindness, patience, and reliability, which are often more persuasive than empty compliments.

Exploiting Emotional Connections

The proverb highlights how one can leverage the powerful emotional bond between a mother and child. Addressing a need of the child creates a sense of gratitude and goodwill in the mother that can be exploited for personal gain.

A Guide to Ingratiation

This proverb serves as a timeless piece of cynical advice on social maneuvering, suggesting that the most effective way to gain favor with someone is to show kindness or perform services for those they care about. It applies to courtship, politics, and seeking patronage.

Psychological Realism

The proverb reveals a deep psychological truth: actions that demonstrate care for a loved one often bypass intellectual defenses and create a powerful emotional bond. It's a form of flattery through deeds, not words.

Strategy of Indirect Influence

The proverb reflects a social dynamic where influencing a person of power (the mother) is achieved by tending to the needs of their dependents (the child). The cross-reference, 'Many kiss the child for the nurse's sake', reinforces this theme of indirect influence.

Gender and Courtship Dynamics

Framed within a traditional courtship context, the proverb highlights how demonstrating kindness and a caring nature towards a child is perceived as a reliable indicator of a suitor's good character, making it a potent strategy for winning a mother's affection.

Rhetorical Devices

Cause and Effect Structure

The proverb is structured as a clear cause-and-effect statement ('He that...kisses...'), making its strategic advice direct and memorable.

Metaphor

The entire proverb functions as a metaphor for gaining favor through indirect means, where the physical acts represent broader social strategies.

Juxtaposition

The contrast between the humble, slightly unpleasant image of 'wiping the child's nose' and the rewarding, affectionate image of 'kisses the mother's cheek' creates a striking and memorable impact.