Come and welcome, go by and no QUARREL

Insights

Indifference and Self-Sufficiency

The proverb metaphorically expresses a philosophy of emotional indifference and self-sufficiency. It suggests that one can be open to relationships and social interaction without being dependent on them, maintaining peace regardless of others' actions.

Establishing Boundaries

It serves as a tool for setting clear, peaceful social boundaries. The phrase establishes the terms of engagement: presence is welcome, but absence is equally acceptable, thereby preventing potential misunderstandings or feelings of being slighted.

Passive-Aggressive Politeness

The saying can be interpreted as a form of passive-aggressive politeness. While appearing welcoming on the surface, it can subtly convey that the speaker is uninvested in the other's presence, essentially saying, 'Your coming or going is of no consequence to me.'

Social Etiquette

This proverb reflects a specific social grace that balances hospitality with personal space, establishing a clear boundary that prevents social obligation or pressure. It communicates that while company is appreciated, it is not required for the host's peace of mind.

Literary Irony

Jonathan Swift's satirical use of a similar phrase in 'Polite Conversation' highlights its potential for irony, where feigned politeness can mask genuine indifference or even a desire to be left alone. This reveals the gap between literal meaning and social intent.

Psychological Self-Reliance

The proverb embodies a psychological stance of emotional self-sufficiency and non-attachment. It suggests a state of being where one's contentment is not dependent on the presence or absence of others, projecting a sense of inner peace or a defense against disappointment.

Rhetorical Devices

Parallelism

The proverb is built on a balanced parallel structure, contrasting the act of arriving ('Come and welcome') with the act of departing or passing by ('go by and no quarrel'), which creates a memorable rhythm.

Understatement

The phrase 'no quarrel' is a significant understatement, implying a complete absence of resentment, concern, or emotional disturbance, which effectively emphasizes the speaker's equanimity or indifference.

Juxtaposition

The direct, imperative 'Come' and 'go' paired with the resulting social condition ('welcome' and 'no quarrel') creates a concise and powerful statement of social terms.