Meaning & Analysis
One may engage in playful behavior or jesting, but it should not cause physical harm, emotional pain, or public shame to others.
Insights
Boundaries in Social Interaction
The proverb metaphorically establishes the importance of respect and sensitivity in play or jest, recognizing that amusement must have limits to prevent harm or humiliation.
Ethics of Humor
It addresses the moral responsibility of the joker or playful companion, distinguishing between harmless fun and actions that cross into cruelty or insult.
Mutual Consent
The proverb signals that play and jest require tacit agreement and trust between participants; laughter and fun are only genuine if all parties feel safe and uninjured.
Historical Symbolism
From the Renaissance onward, etiquette writers and moralists frequently cited this proverb to encourage civility and self-restraint. It encapsulates the transition from unrestrained jest to more refined social conduct as valued in early modern society.
Cultural Resonance
Variants of this proverb appear in many cultures, underscoring a near-universal recognition that humor and play can quickly turn to offense if boundaries are not observed. Its frequent literary citation attests to enduring anxieties about public shaming and social exclusion.
Psychological Dimensions
By drawing a clear line between play and harm, the proverb highlights the psychological need for security and respect in social bonds. It recognizes that ridicule or mockery, even when disguised as jest, can inflict deep wounds.
Rhetorical Devices
Parallelism
The proverb uses parallel structure ('play with me... hurt me not; jest with me... shame me not') to reinforce its balanced, reciprocal message.
Antithesis
Juxtaposes positive actions ('play', 'jest') with their potential negative consequences ('hurt', 'shame'), clarifying the ethical distinction.
Aphorism
Its concise, memorable phrasing lends the proverb the status of an ethical rule, easy to recall and apply in daily conduct.
Transcription
Quotations
This common Prouerbe, Jape with me but hurt me not, Bourde with me but shame me not.
*That excellent rule of civilitie is evermore to be kept.
This good prouerbe: Play with mee; but hurt me not: and iest with me; but disgrace me not.
He ieasts but ill that hurts him whom he ieasts with.
(but hurt and but shame).
Play with me, and hurt me not.
(but hurt and but shame).
Play with me, but hurt me not.
Play, but hurt not; jest, but shame not.
Play and grieve not, jest and disgrace not.
To jest is tolerable, but to do Harm by Jest is insufferable.
Related Proverbs
Original Scan
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