Refuse a WIFE with one fault and take one with two

Meaning & Analysis

If you reject a potential spouse for having a single, minor flaw, you are likely to end up with someone who has even more faults. It is a caution against being overly critical in the pursuit of an unattainable ideal.

Insights

The Pitfall of Perfectionism

The proverb serves as a broader metaphor for the dangers of perfectionism in any significant life choice. Rejecting a very good option (a job, a home, a project) because of a small imperfection often results in being forced to accept a much worse alternative later.

The Cost of Indecision

It illustrates the principle that delaying a good decision in the hope of a perfect one is a losing strategy. Opportunities are finite, and indecision or excessive scrutiny can lead to a state where one's options have worsened considerably.

Ironic Consequences

The act of refusing the person with 'one fault' ironically leads to a worse outcome. This highlights the folly of hyper-criticism, where the attempt to secure a better result directly causes a poorer one.

Embracing Imperfection

The proverb champions a pragmatic worldview that embraces imperfection as an inherent part of life and humanity. It advises that wisdom lies not in finding a flawless choice, but in recognizing and accepting the best available option, faults and all.

Psychology of Perfectionism

This proverb taps into the 'paradox of choice', a psychological phenomenon where the pursuit of a perfect option leads to decision paralysis and dissatisfaction. It cautions against the cognitive bias of overvaluing hypothetical future choices while devaluing tangible, present opportunities.

Historical Pragmatism

Originating in a context where marriage was often a pragmatic social and economic contract, the proverb warns against pickiness that could lead to a less advantageous match. Rejecting a suitable partner over a minor flaw was not just a romantic misstep but a strategic error.

Philosophical Resonance

The proverb is a classic expression of the philosophical idea that 'the perfect is the enemy of the good'. It champions a pragmatic approach to life, suggesting that accepting a good-but-imperfect reality is wiser than chasing an unattainable ideal.

Modern Dating Paradox

In the modern era of dating apps and seemingly endless options, the proverb serves as a powerful antidote to 'choice overload'. It critiques the tendency to discard good partners in an endless swipe-culture, warning that such behavior often leads to diminished prospects and greater dissatisfaction.

Rhetorical Devices

Antithesis

The proverb's power comes from the direct and memorable contrast between the outcomes of two choices, framed by the numerical opposition of 'one fault' versus 'two'.

Irony

The structure is built on situational irony, where the action taken to avoid a small problem (one fault) directly results in a bigger one (two faults), highlighting the foolishness of the initial decision.

Declarative Structure

The proverb is phrased as a direct, almost prophetic, statement of cause and effect. This imperative and predictive tone gives it an air of timeless, authoritative advice.

perfectionismchoicepragmatismironyrelationshipsdecision-making
Analyzed with gemini-2.5-pro on August 11, 2025

Transcription

Quotations

1659, HOW., Br. Prov., p. 13

(Wave a wife with no fault, and).

1659, HOW., Eng. Prov., p. 19

Annotations

  1. A British Proverb.

Original Scan

Refuse a WIFE with one fault and take one with two - a scanned entry from Tilley's 1950 Dictionary of Proverbs.
Scan courtesy of HathiTrust Digital Library.
Used under CC BY-NC 3.0.

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Last updated: January 27, 2026