To hold one at STAFF's (stave's) end

Meaning & Analysis

To use a staff or long pole to physically keep someone or something at a distance, preventing them from getting close.

Insights

Emotional Distancing

Signifies the act of intentionally maintaining emotional or social distance, preventing intimacy, familiarity, or personal connection with another person.

Cautious Skepticism

Represents a defensive posture of wariness and distrust, keeping a person or idea at a distance until their intentions or value are proven. It is a method of vetting potential threats.

Active Hostility

Implies a state of antagonism or outright rejection. It is not merely passive distance but an active effort to repel and keep someone in a state of opposition.

Boundary Setting

Illustrates the establishment and enforcement of firm personal or social boundaries to maintain control over an interaction and prevent unwanted influence or intrusion.

Symbolism of the Staff

The staff is a historical tool of defense, authority, and support. This proverb leverages its defensive aspect, portraying it as a primal instrument for enforcing personal space against perceived threats, whether physical (pestilence), spiritual (Satan), or interpersonal.

Psychological Defense

The expression vividly captures the psychological defense mechanism of creating distance to protect oneself from emotional harm, betrayal, or unwanted influence. It externalizes an internal state of self-preservation and emotional guarding.

Social Interaction

The proverb describes a specific, recognizable dynamic in human relationships characterized by formality, suspicion, and a lack of warmth. It can be achieved not just physically but also through cold, formal, or dismissive language, as suggested by the historical quotations.

Rhetorical Devices

Metaphor

The physical act of fending someone off with a staff serves as a powerful metaphor for the abstract concept of creating emotional and social distance.

Imagery

The phrase evokes a strong and clear visual image of a person actively keeping another at bay, making the idea of rejection or caution tangible and memorable.

Synecdoche

The 'staff's end' stands in for the entire concept of a guarded, defensive personal space, encapsulating a complex social posture in a simple, concrete object.

distancerejectioncautionboundariesdefensehostility
Analyzed with gemini-2.5-pro on December 3, 2025

Transcription

Quotations

The most chollericke and troublesome woman liuing vpon the earth, shee was alwaies at the staffes end with my father.

1596, LODGE, Wit's Misery, p. 83

So shall wee both keep Satan at the Stave's End, and also much Sin out of our Souls.

1601, DENT, Pathway to Heaven, p. 137

Barricadoing their doores and windowes with fir brushes, ferne, and bundels of straw to keepe out the pestilence at the staues end.

1603, DEKKER, Wonderful Year: Non-Dram. Wks., I 142

Wouldst thou be held out at stave's end with words?

1618, N. FIELD, Amends for Ladies, IV ii, p. 149

Must I still hold him at the staves end?

1652, FLETCHER, Wild Goose Chase, V iii, p. 382

Keep him at staves end.

1639, CL., s.v. Repellentis, p. 273

I would have held him a little at staves-end, till I had far better proof of his manners to be good.

1680, BUNYAN, Mr. Badman, Wks., III 616

Shakespeare Citations

He holds Belzebub at the stave's end.

TN, V.i

Cross References

Original Scan

To hold one at STAFF's (stave's) end - a scanned entry from Tilley's 1950 Dictionary of Proverbs.
Scan courtesy of HathiTrust Digital Library.
Used under CC BY-NC 3.0.

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Last updated: January 27, 2026